Negative Nanny here! I'm back to complain about how miserable I am. Today was one of the worst days I've had in a long time. I'm not entirely sure what the catalyst was, but I was determined to sleep the day away. Unfortunately, my husband has a sense of when something's up, and usually calls to wake me up and check on me. Even then, I slept until 2 today. I think wallowing about all of my issues is definitely a vicious cycle. There's just so much that Ryan and I are going through right now. It's got our lives turned upside down. He's got several job opportunities, causing us to have to decide where we want to move, causing us to regret being away from BOTH our families, causing me to not want to commit to a job because we'll be gone soon. What to do? Well, we did what we always do. We went to the temple. Today I prayed my heart out in a way that I've never done. I think we spent a good 45 minutes sitting in the Celestial Room, me crying for most of it.
I have my issues, Ryan has his, and it's hard to balance them out. We're at the point in our marriage where we're making big decisions. Life-changing decisions. Some are dreams come true, but they always have the "what if" attached. Our lives feel like they're up in the air, and being OCD, I hate that. I guess all we can do is put it all in the Lord's hands. Neither of us has the mental/emotional capacity to continually stress about these issues. I'm just hoping that in a few months, we can share all of our big news, when it all sorts itself out. Right now, we have no idea what's going on. (Somewhat typical of both of our lives)
"She who kneels before God, can stand before anyone."
(Day 29)
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